‘My in-laws gifted me a cheque for IVF for my birthday – but I refuse to do it’

A woman on Reddit claimed she walked out of her own birthday party when her mother-in-law tried to gift her money to pay for a round of IVF as she doesn’t want to do it

It’s a heartbreaking situation they’re all in (stock photo)

For people who want nothing more than to start a family, being told you can’t conceive naturally can be devastating.

And while options such as IVF can make your dreams come true, the process is expensive and can take several attempts to be successful – which can take its toll on a couple both mentally and physically.

One 35-year-old woman on Reddit has claimed she and her husband have wanted children together for years but after several failed rounds of IVF, she no longer wants to keep trying.

She wrote: “Me and my husband have been together for seven years. I always wanted to be a mum and growing up I always had baby dolls that I considered as my ‘babies’. I also remember talking to my husband about kids during our first date – I told him I wanted at least five children, maybe more, and he kept laughing.

“Unfortunately, we’ve done everything possible to have kids, but it was hopeless. Our recent option was IVF. Let me say, it’s one of the hardest experiences I’ve gone through. We went through several sessions of IVF, but none worked.

She has already gone through several failed rounds of IVF (stock image)


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“After our last IVF trial failed, my husband cried himself to sleep for weeks. I felt awful because it felt like I was letting him down since I’m the one with the most issues here.

“I told my husband I was done trying and he understood, but his family didn’t take it well. They kept trying to talk me into doing one more session, but I declined, and the pressure kept coming – especially from my mother-in-law.”

The woman celebrated her birthday last week but was shocked when her in-laws handed her a range of baby clothes and toys as gifts.

And the penny dropped when she opened the present her mother-in-law had given her – which included a cheque to cover the cost of another round of IVF.

The woman doesn’t want to go through the pain of another failed IVF round


She said: “My birthday was last week. My in-laws threw me a huge party and most of them brought baby clothes and toys as gifts, and I had no idea why.

“My mother-in-law handed me a small box. I opened it and there was a pair of baby socks and a cheque. I knew what this was about right away because the money she ‘gifted’ me is what people pay for a round of IVF.

“I asked why she was giving me money for another round of IVF after I said I was done trying. She said she hoped I’d do this one last time for her and family because she prayed, and God showed her signs that this will work this time.

“I was mad I told her she didn’t understand how much of an exhausting and emotionally and physically draining process this is, and only to be disappointed again is just not worth it anymore.

“I almost cried thinking that all they think of when they see me is kids and how I failed at having them.”

Ultimately, the woman walked out of her party – but is now receiving messages from her in-laws saying she has “shattered their hopes” of becoming grandparents.

She added: “My mother-in-law tried to argue but I returned the gift and walked out, which set the family off later saying that I was giving up on everyone. They called me selfish to decide to stop trying without talking to them, knowing how it will affect them since they were and are hoping and praying for at least one grandchild.

“She and her family said I shattered their hopes and dreams after returning the gift and said I was negative and dismissive.

“My husband who didn’t attend the party because he was with a friend said I should’ve accepted the gift instead of disrespecting everyone and leaving.”

Over 800 people responded to the woman’s post, with many slamming the in-laws for their behaviour and branding them “selfish”.

Others wondered why her husband hadn’t done more to protect her from his family, while some just shared messages of support and encouragement to remind the woman she was not a failure.

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