Tom Brady kindly would like you to get off his lawn and stop fucking with traditions that are super-duper important, like jersey numbers. The NFL has passed a rule to relax their jersey number options, allowing running backs, wide receivers, and tight ends to wear any number from 1-49 and 80-89. Defensive backs can now wear 1-49, and linebackers can now wear 1-59 and 90-99. This, apparently, is a problem for Brady.
Brady sounds like he should be wearing a backward hat and sunglasses in his Facebook profile picture while sporting a really thin goatee while pounding a case of Bud Light from his lawn chair on a Tuesday morning. He continued on his instagram story:
“Why not let lineman [sic] wear whatever they want too? Why have numbers? Just have colored jerseys… why not wear the same number? …DUMB.”
That “… DUMB” sent me. It looks like the ending to every response of every narrow-minded bigot on social media, and I can’t stop laughing. Honestly, Brady implying that players will have a hard time knowing their assignments because the jersey number of the player they’re responsible for blocking might change numbers sounds like a massive slap in the face to the intelligence of his teammates. He didn’t mention that it would be hard for him to read opposing defenses, yet it’s apparently a problem for everyone else? Good bit of superiority there, Tom.
Here’s an idea: stop insulting the intelligence of your teammates and thinking that a form of personal expression as simple as a jersey number is going to wreak havoc on the integrity of the game. Please, for the love of all that is good, nobody let Brady on any governing board like the make-believe “competition committee” when he finally retires from his playing career.
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